Whether your relationship is Rock Solid or On the Rocks…spending just a little time on your relationship can make a huge difference!  When it comes to Couples and Relationships, researcher Dr. John Gottman is a ROCK STAR.  Our Psychologist Olivia Dangas has gathered some of Dr. Gottman’s information for you. 

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6 Hours to a Better Relationship

Dr. John Gottman is an established researcher in all things love and relationships. His research has shown that committing 6 hours a week to our relationships can have a profound impact on their quality and function.

  1. Partings

Instead of rushing out the door and into our work days, it is important to take a couple of minutes to connect with our partners. Ask questions about your partner’s day; inquire about the exciting and not so exciting things they have upcoming.

10 minutes/week (2 minutes a day x 5 working days)

  1. Reunions

When you reunite with your partner at the end of the day, take a couple of intentional moments to connect and embrace. Spend some time after having a stress-reducing conversation.

One hour and 40 mins/week (20 minutes a day x 5 working days)

  1. Appreciation and Admiration

Take special note of the things you admire and appreciate about your partner. When we look for these things, we naturally pick up on them and feel them even more. It is also important to then reflect these things you notice to your partner, in order to foster positive feelings for you both.

Thirty-five minutes/week (5 minutes a day, 7 days a week)

  1. Affection

Dr. Gottman notes that embracing each other (kiss, hug, cuddle) before falling asleep greatly helps with connection. Take a moment to mindfully use this connection to help let go of any minor stresses that have built up in the day.

Thirty-five minutes/week (5 minutes a day, 7 days a week)

  1. Date Night

Schedule a date night once a week, where it can be just you and your partner. This may be an outing or even just a movie night at home after the kids go to bed. Regardless, use this time to take turns asking open ended questions; be curious and turn towards each other.

Two hours/week

  1. State of the Union Meeting

Spend just one hour a week discussing areas of concern in the relationship. This gives each partner freedom and safety in being able to express their fears and concerns during this defined period of time.

1 hour/week

Source: www.gottman.com/blog/6-hours-a-week-to-a-better-relationship/

This is great stuff, Olivia!  I’m a big fan of John Gottman 🙂

Olivia would love to work with you.  She works with Adults, Couples and Youth 13+.

Book your appointment with OLIVIA, here.

Cheers to great relationships, 


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